Coach Chez Wise
The holidays are expected to be a bright and cheerful time, filled
with family and friends. For those caring for another it can be a time
filled with stress, disappointment, frustration and sadness. For
individuals who have been experiencing MCI,
or Alzheimer’s, they may feel even greater distress and a deeper sense
of loss. This is caused by the changes he or she has experienced.
Caregivers far too often are overwhelmed. Family may want too
much from the senior and the caregiver as well. For the Caregiver,
they can end up feeling pulled in many directions at the same time.
They may want to participate in the holiday hub bub, and spend long
periods of time with the other family members or have them to the
house. This can be overwhelming physically, emotionally, and
financially. Caregivers may be concerned about how family will react
to the changes that have happened to the loved one as a result of the
advancing of the disease.
Get honest about your family. If they have not been involved all year
long, then they do not understand the changes that have occurred. As
the primary caregiver, it is up to you to ensure they understand the
circumstances surrounding your loved one, and respect that you know
what is best for them.
Some simple rules of thumb:
Do not expect that any of your family members understand the changes
that have taken place. They may not understand how the loved one will
react with the entire family and extended family gathered together.
You need to be the one to make sure everyone else understands that Dad
or Mom may not be able to participate as they did in the past, and
neither can you.
Extremely long drives to the sister that lives 90 miles away may not
be feasible. These drives can be physically exhausting, and the
strange house may cause unnecessary anxiety and acting out.
Large gatherings with lots of noise, and
small children, are difficult. They may not be able to hear
well with so many people talking and a lot of noise. This may very
well cause your loved one much anxiety and fear.
Your family may not have truly understood that Mom or Dad, may not
remember their names, or confuse or forget grandchildren. They may
take it personally, and have feelings of hurt and dismay.
About the Author:
Coach Chez is a recovery coach, helping
individuals make lasting change in behavior and emotions. Senior
Motivate 4 Success helps Seniors and Families find ways to deal with
change as we age. Check us out at
Senior Motivate 4 Success and be sure to
see our special program for the holidays at